Read (from the New Living Translation)

Matthew 22:37-39

37 Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

Luke 6:37

37 “Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven.

Go Deep

What does it mean to forgive both wisely AND recklessly? Carlos from The Carlos & Joy Show uses an unexpected analogy to explain something that will impact your everyday life.

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48 comments
  1. Profile photo of Brenda

    I love that, “recklessly” forgive ALL those that have hurt or wronged me. That is how I want to live with everyone I come in contact with. And to recklessly and sincerely ask for forgiveness from any that I may have hurt!

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      I remember Chuck Swindoll talking about grace as being “risky” … Risky (Chuck) & Reckless (Carlos). Both … GOD! Yes, Brenda, thank you Jesus for taking a risk on us & giving us your reckless forgiveness. May people see that “radical” lifestyle of Jesus in us. Thanks Brenda for leading us off today. Hasn’t this been a great series!?

      • Profile photo of Brenda

        It is! I have been blessed by every devotion, and am eagerly looking forward to tomorrow’s post. I am thankful to everyone that has contributed to this series.

  2. Profile photo of kskoerner

    Forgive abundantly, what a great concept. Thank you Carlos.

  3. Profile photo of Pauline

    I was hurt deeply by someone once and carried that bitterness for many years it was only through Christ that I was a to let go. I forgave with my whole heart and moved on. I felt free. He died 6 months later breaking my heart. I learned forgiveness is free and can’t be withheld. We must forgive with our whole hearts as you said recklessly. To be free. I am thankful God pursed me to forgive and move on.

    • Profile photo of Asher
      Asher

      That really puts things into perspective: we should forgive recklessly because we never know when those who sin against us will breathe their last. If we don’t hang on to bitterness, we won’t need to feel guilty for being unforgiving when they pass away. Thank you for sharing, Pauline and Carlos!

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      Hallelujah, Pauline! No regrets for you because you followed our Lord’s leading. Thanks for your example & encouragement to us to be FREE indeed!

  4. Deb

    Love this. Thank you Carlos but I am struggling in an area. I think I have forgiven this person but I am having trouble forgetting what happened so does that mean I really haven’t forgiven them.? This study has really gotten me to do a lot of thinking and soul searching. Any guidance would be appreciated.

    • Wendy

      Hi Deb! I feel that forgiving and forgetting are two different things. Forgiveness is for you. It is a choice you make to release you of the hurt, anger and bitterness that you hold inside. Forgetting is something that you don’t have to do just because you have forgiven. I suggest being mindful when you remember this person or the hurt that you have experienced not to let the hurt and anger back in. I have found that when I truly forgive, I feel so free that I also choose not to look back and put myself in that position again. So I recommend looking up to our Lord and Savior and focusing on the journey that he is leading me into. Enjoy this day that God has blessed you with, there is only one day like it!

      • Deb

        Thank you for the wise words.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      Join the club on this, Deb. God created our minds to remember, but if the Bible says that our sins are “forgotten” by God Who is omniscient (Isaiah 43.25; Hebrews 10.14-18), then I can choose to forget in His Name & with His Power. “I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me” [Philippians 4.13]. All glory to God!
      For more reading on your great question, see https://www.gotquestions.org/does-God-forget.html

      • Profile photo of Debbie Bluestone

        Wendy and Pastor Dave…I agree with all that was said. What I need to do is the ‘letting go’ since I have apologized (and she refused to forgive). I feel like it’s on her if she wants to carry the burden now.

      • Deb

        Thank you. This gives me more to think about. I liked the web link.

  5. Profile photo of bwilliams38

    Ok. So, Carlos, for the first time in this series you made me laugh instead of tear up or cry! The toilet paper thing. One thing my husband does is leave small pieces of paper around. A tag he took off clothes. A gum wrapper. And I get so frustrated because why not just put it in the trash? But you helped me realize that I just need to keep forgiving this because it really is pointless to keep getting upset about something so small. Not that it will be easy because it drives me batty but thank you for your story af something similar. Because 99% of the time those are the things that are hardest for me to forgive and let go.

    • Profile photo of Penny Hambey

      Yes! I learned this when I was young and married. I was always upset with my husband for not putting things back in the “right” place. I would say why can’t you just move that 2″ over… and he would say, if you want ir 2″ inches over, move it- what’s the big deal? It always irked me! But, I finally learned that I was the one it bothered- it didn’t bother him and to keep peace, if it bothered me “that” much…I needed to move to the “right” place… lol Now, things are much easier!

  6. Profile photo of Chip
    Chip

    Hey Carlos! Has your wife forgiven you for using her toothbrush yet. 🙂

    • Daisies4Me

      Or his “dirty” jeans?! LOL

  7. Profile photo of Klparker350

    This is a wonderful message. I love that you brought a thing like the toilet paper roll into it because I think a lot of times as married couples we forget to forgive those small things and it builds up a bitterness toward each other that starts to break down the relationship and then you get naggy wives and distant husbands instead of the closeness that forgiveness brings.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      Wise words & wise actions indeed! But I have to say, I’m glad there will be no toilet paper in heaven! 😉

  8. Nelly

    I loved this, Carlos! I’ve been stuck in this black hole of hurt and “wanting to be angry” BUT also guilt because I know it is not the right thing to do. You just shed a ray of light down my way and I thank you for that.

  9. Profile photo of lorilu

    What a great thing to try and do! Forgive abundantly!
    Love the Indiana J. reference… You’re spot on, he does end up turning things around for good after his recklessness!
    Awesome share, Carlos, thanks for the light hearted and powerful words!

  10. Jamie K

    Awesome look at forgiving others, recklessly is what Jesus teaches but we struggle with it. Thank you

  11. Profile photo of sasunday

    What a great message. It does feel reckless to forgive sometimes! But, the freedom it brings is incomparable. Thank you!

  12. Cody Deno

    My mom and dad do things that frustrate me too. Most of the things they do that bother me are small, stupid things. Sometimes I get into arguments with them about these things, and say rude, hurtful things to each other. Thankfully, we always make up and move past those stupid arguments and rude comments, but I still wish we wouldn’t get into those arguments in the first place.

    I think if I stopped being such a control freak and stopped sweating the small stuff so much, it would help me not get so frustrated with them.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      You show true wisdom, Cody! Thanks for being willing to be vulnerable … & a loving son!

  13. Kimberly

    After years ago working for a doctor ad her nurse, and some of the comments she would say to me about my mother with lung cancer and brother with colon cancer, that they were gonna die anyway it was very hard to forgive those harsh words. Took a long time. I had to change me and see me as a better person for trusting in the Lord.

  14. Profile photo of Carl
    Carl

    Indiana Jones analogy …. LOVE IT! If only I looked that good in a fedora!

  15. Tina Ledbetter

    Awesome comparison Carlos. Forgiveness is hard for some situations and some people. We only hurt ourselves if we choose not to forgive.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      Yes, Tina. That hurt is even worse (& longer lasting!) than the hurt I received. Such true comments!

  16. Profile photo of Debbie Bluestone

    what I struggle with is letting go…when you hurt someone (intentional or accidental), you apologize and ask for forgiveness, but they refuse to forgive you and continue to hold the grudge, how then do I let it go knowing I’ve apologized and asked to have it withheld

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      It hurts, but it’s their “prison” not yours, Debbie. You are free in Christ. Our prayers then become, “Lord, may my friend enjoy the freedom in their own heart that You have so graciously given to me … and may we be reconciled for Your honor.”

  17. Profile photo of Deborah Snedecor

    I like the analogy to Indiana Jones! We need to Forgive both wisely and recklessly!

  18. Profile photo of Big Country

    Thank you Carlos. I need to work at being a reckless forgiver. I do well for a while but it seems like I run of forgiveness to offer and I have to fight that and continually forgive no matter who keeps and continuously offends me even if it’s 1000 little things added up. Thanks for the reminder of another way forgiveness looks like and should look like!

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      I always run out of forgiveness, like you, BC. I’m glad God will give me His power & love & grace to forgive when I humble myself before Him.

  19. Daisies4Me

    I am of the mindset that one should verbalize their hurts. So would I forgive abundantly and “bury that thing” w/o speaking with the person that has hurt me?

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      It’s always good to speak with the person (Matthew 5.23-25), when possible & when it’s safe.

  20. Eyes wide shut

    It is very hard to give completely yourself once you have been hurt by ones you trusted with all your heart. I needed to forgive that person before being able to truly move on.Years after a major hurt in my life, I had the chance to reconnect by phone with the person who broke my heart. After talking the whole break up over, I learned that God really did me a favor by not allowing me my heart’s desire at the time. Just by this person just saying “I’m sorry”-“I didn’t know” I felt validated. I was exhausted from carrying that burden. The relief of forgiving him was mind boggling. God truly allowed me the ability to breathe again. I carried this for years & it made me wherry then to learn I was the one with the power was kind of humbling. I did not have to go through all those years of pain if I only kept looking forward to the path God was setting before me.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      So glad that you have found that freedom & reconciliation, EWS. Your story will embolden others to do the hard work you have done. Thanks for sharing!

  21. Allison

    What if you have forgiven someone and they don’t except it? What then? I have struggled with this for a couple of years now. I offered my forgiveness to someone that had deeply wounded me. They,in turn believe they did nothing wrong, rejected the forgiveness and have placed me in the role as the wrongdoer. My only answer was to prayer for this person daily, and move on. Still hurt tho.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      Allison, you are correct in praying & moving on. You are not responsible for their actions/reactions. All of us answer to God, the Righteous Judge. I am sorry you still hurt, but I’m happy that you will experience God’s blessings ahead because of your obedience. I’m glad you are praying. Prayer makes us stronger.

  22. Peg Walden

    I choose recklessness!! 🙂

  23. Profile photo of CarrieAnn71272

    I love that God loved us so much He gave us the amazing power of forgiveness. When someone has hurt me…I don’t have to stay under that power of pain. I can choose to forgive and it cleans MY soul! Thank you Jesus for this amazing gift!!!

  24. Susie

    WoW Carlos! That was an awesome analogy using Indiana Jones! Your Rock! I never really thought of forgivness quite the way you put it. Thank you for this. I believe this will be very beneficial on my journey of forgiveness. God bless you and Way fm!