Read (from the New Living Translation)

Matthew 7:3

3 “And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye[a] when you have a log in your own?

Go Deep

What does forgiveness look like within a marriage? Wally from The Wally Show talks with his wife, Mardi, about what it has looked like for them. She has some great insights on the role that prayer plays into the everyday life of sticking by someone – even when it’s hard.

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  1. Profile photo of Jennie

    Thank you for the video! You are a beautiful couple and your words are so encouraging! I love how you said you need to ask God to change you, not the other person. That is a lesson I need to work on in my life!

    • Luann

      Thank you! I needed to hear that today. It’s much easier to want God to change the other person, but if you ask God to change your own heart, you both will grow. God bless you guys, your marriage and your family! Thank you for being transparent.

  2. Michelle

    Thank you for sharing! I have learned one thing about forgiveness in marriage over the last 23 years. My husband had an issue with internet integrity and it was a difficult thing to walk through, but I think our marriage lasted and is stronger than ever because the same grace that saves me everyday from my sins and shortcomings is the same grace we try to extend to each other. I learned I could tell him how his struggle made me feel, but I refused to hold that over him – extended grace. I continued to tell him that I loved him and nothing would change that-extended grace. But, The biggest thing that I did was change my prayer. I prayed that I would put God first in my life and therefore nothing my husband did would rock me because that is not where my worth should come from(I had to ask for forgiveness from him for making him carry the burden of my self worth for so long-he extended grace), and then I prayed that prayer for him. I prayed, not that he would overcome his internet integrity issues, but that he would simply put God first. Internet integrity was a symptom, a coping mechanism for life since he was a very young boy. The solution was to put Jesus first and allow Jesus to help him overcome the real issues in his life. God is good and faithful. Putting God first will change everything!

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      Wow, Michelle! That is the essence of what Jesus said it the first & the greatest command (Matthew 22.36-40). When we love Jesus first & foremost, then everything else can line up. Everyone wins! Thanks for sharing your story!

  3. Stephen Caruso

    Thank you both for sharing. This is a message I needed to hear. I will now prayer for myself for better understanding and compassion, Instead of praying others change to my way of seeing.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      God is really changing a lot of us, isn’t He Stephen? The angels in Heaven must really be rejoicing around the throne of God! What a great Easter gift this is from us to our loving Savior!

  4. Profile photo of Jason Holt

    Thank you way-fm for the forgiveness small group. I know there is a need for me to forgive my ex wife and with most days lessons you hit on just the reason I need to forgive her. In his time.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      Praying for you, Jason. You are truly becoming God’s man. I wonder how she will react??? All for God’s glory!

  5. Profile photo of lorilu

    Great insight from your experience!
    Thanks so much, for sharing, and may God continue to bless your marriage!
    : )

  6. Eyes wide shut

    This helped point out that I need to be in prayer for my husband’s heart to change towards our daughter who is in college & struggling daily with her trying to become an adult but letting her mouth burn bridges with my husband. My prayer needs to be that he learns to give love unconditionally to her & others. Not I give you my love because you did this, that or the other. People need to know they are loved no matter what they may do or not do. My prayer for my daughter needs to be “God please guide her heart to follow you.” She is a God loving young lady who needs our love & support while she bumps around to find her place in the world. I ask for your prayers for our family during this growth period.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      Dear EWS, what a blessing to see families stand for God. You are modern-day Josephs (Genesis 37-50), following our ever-contemporary God of Truth in our changing culture. Praying for a new year of fresh blessings upon you all. Love truly covers a multitudes of our “bumps” as you say (1 Peter 4.8)!

  7. Profile photo of sasunday

    I have been praying and praying for my husband to have a change of heart and work towards reconciliation rather than divorce. I have focused on asking Him to change my husband’s heart. Although, I have tried to focus my energies on being close to God and being loving and respectful to my husband, I think I have just learned that my prayers need focused in a different direction for him and for myself.
    Thank you for this thought provoking lesson.
    I will continue to pray with hope.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      Praying for supernatural reconciliation for you both … and that tons of people know it!

  8. Rebecca

    Thank you for your video it’s always great to see couples who work together in their marriage. I myself hope to find someone who can love me for all of me but that seems to be a distant thought now. I was married for a little while but divorced back in ’09 I keep thinking God has forgiven me and I know He has but I’m sad that I’m still trying to find someone a nice guy. This is an encouraging message to me and hopefully some day I will get to put it into practice.

    • Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

      God knows how to get His people to cross paths … I’m praying that for you this year, Rebecca. And I think that man is praying for the same thing too! Keep trusting!

  9. Profile photo of Pastor Dave WAY-FM

    Thanks Wally & Mardi for your example of mutual respect & love for one another … and for your dependence together on the Lord, Who will never lead us astray! This is the one time I can truly say, “Me first” & God gets the greater honor. I’m with ya – GOD, CHANGE ME!!!

  10. Margie

    Thank you for sharing with us. God bless you both & your marriage!

  11. Sally

    Wow! Have you been watching me?? 🙂 Wally and Mardi have re-affirmed for me today what I suspected all along. I need to be changed and then God can use me to change my situation! Thank you, Lord!

  12. Profile photo of Shannaw Martin

    That’s good!! Change your heart first! Change your heart and attitude towards that other persoN first so they can see the change in you! Ask God to change your heart first so that others will see and will want what you have! Thank you Wally n Mardi

  13. Cody Deno

    Often, I want those who are closest to me to change. Some things they do frustrate me. But now that I reflect on those things, some of them seem so silly. Why did I let those things bother me so much?

    I guess I am too controlling and want things my way. This is something I need to work on. I need to not worry about things that are out of my control, like other people; instead, do something about things that are in my control, like myself and my attitude.

    Thank you Wally and Mardi. Your message taught me some things about forgiveness that I am going to try to apply to my life.

  14. Paula Slack

    Great message Wally and Mardi. Thank you fir showing us what a good marriage is all about.

  15. Profile photo of Big Country

    So true. Now I am no expert at marriage because I have never been married but from my observations Wally hit the point when he said that we need to ask God to change us instead of the other person. From my observations marriages usually struggle because at least one if not both of them expect the other person to change but not themselves. And even as an unmarried person, I believe it’s important to ask God to change me daily so that way I can continually seek him and treat others the way he intends me to. Great lesson!

  16. Val

    When we ask God to guide and shape behavior, to it is the example of each of us coming to God owning our own behavior and responsibility in any relationship we are in.
    My husband and I have been married for 26 years and we have 2 beautiful children and the road has definitely not been easy. Before we had kids he told me, he did not want to have children, I was upset but insisted of being angry, I prayed and I asked for me to content with my life.
    As he was helping me to be content, he was working on my husband’s heart.

  17. Profile photo of Mr.Danni

    Great testimony! God bless your family Wally.

  18. Profile photo of Brenda

    Thank you so much for the reminder. I know to seek God first to change my heart, but too often I turn my eyes to the ‘problem’ instead of fixing my energies on the only solution.

  19. Pamela Anne McCoy

    Thank you for your testimony for how we are to forgive each other and look at our own hearts first.

  20. Profile photo of CarrieAnn71272

    My Jewish husband just came to accept Christ last month!
    In the beginning of our relationship I was a Christian but not in a solid relationship with Christ. Then when our marriage entered into Troubled Waters I went back to what I knew which was my faith and God and begin growing deeper and deeper into a relationship with God. However I also had started demanding for my husband that he needed to believe. After 4 plus years of a marriage that was shredded I began to pray for my heart, my husbands heart and of our marriage. (In that order) I backed off and decided my walk and faith was not even near perfect with Christ and I needed to practice my walk before I encouraged someone else to walk with Christ. I needed to lead by example. Show my faith and relationship with Christ by growing my own spirituality. In doing this I gave my husband space and this space i moved out of allowed God room to move in and start working on his heart and his soul and help him. When I finally got out of the way God was able to move into position with my husband and slowly teach him how much love God has to offer us. 10 years of praying for my husband and he is now a believer!! Thank You Jesus!

  21. Tina Ledbetter

    Love your testimony. You are such an encouragement to couples everywhere. Thanks for all that you do to get the word of God out to the world.

  22. Debbie

    I really appreciates you guys, it is the “LOVE” that you have for each other that makes you to “FORGIVE” easily, keep it up. God is with you!!!